The reverse culture shock

There is the culture shock. And then there is the reverse culture shock. The latter is when you come back home after many years abroad and you feel like a foreigner in your home country or home town. This can be very common and I would love other people to share their experience with all of us.

It happened to me in many ways, from the very beginning when I started to travel at age 18. I went to Morocco and when I came back I felt like I wasn't the same person as before. But when I was home and people just asked me how my trip was I realized they couldn't really understand what I had experienced, perhaps they just wanted to hear a few words whereas for me an entire book wouldn't be enough to explain why I felt like I had changed so much.

It's just something... you cannot really share. Maybe that was the first time I really felt alone at home. There are the ones who leave and the ones who stay.

It continued like that after every trip I had but even more after living abroad for 8 years. That's where I started liking the German expression Die Wanderung, which is the state of wandering around without belonging anywhere. That can be dreadful. I couldn't squeeze myself enough to fit in my home town, I had seen too many things, talked to too many people, felt the world and experienced its huge diversity, how could I ever be able to share that with my people? Because, human beings feel compelled to share, right? And when they can't... well, it's painful.

Two years ago, the reverse cultural shock was the reason why I left again for another two years abroad. I couldn't bear it. And now that I've decided to come back I still feel vulnerable, like I missed many things of the local history, I'm missing some references and 8 years of my daily life are completely unknown to everybody here. I could have been kidnapped by aliens and come back, that would be the same. It's like a hole of 8 years.

And yet, I cannot say I'm not grateful for the wonderful experiences I had, I'm just striving for a brand new way to creatively find my way in this new globalized world, where more and more of us have, are having and will have this kind of experience.

Global or local? Wise or delirious?

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